wecanavenge: (Don't give me that shit)
Erik Lensherr | ( Magneto ) ([personal profile] wecanavenge) wrote2012-07-28 04:30 pm

✘ | 007 | VIDEO

[Filtered away from Ivy]

[And early evening on Saturday, when he's sure he'll be able to catch the majority of the student body, everyone's device is going to light up and make noise. Because there will be no claims of ignorance on this since Erik has to give this speech; if he gets to deal with this subject, then so do you.]

Attention, students. Yes, all of you. Put down your video games and, yes, even your homework for the next five minutes, or I'll be forced to call an assembly. I know you don't want to waste your Saturday night in the auditorium anymore than I do.

[He clears his throat, and looks awkward for just a moment before rolling his eyes. How he pulled this lot he doesn't know, but he's going to have a little fun with it. Maybe a tiny bit unprofessionally but WHO'S JUDGING.]

You can all thank Mr. Kirk for this lovely discussion we're about to have, but it's come to my attention that the start of year request to avoid overly friendly interactions with our current forest protector wasn't quite enough for your simple minds to grasp. It's fallen to me [for some reason 8|] to remind you all that it would be best to stay out of the forest entirely. She does not take well to harm to her plants, and the school does not take well to calls from hysterical parents, asking how their perfect darling could possibly have developed poison ivy down there.

[And a pause where he pinches the bridge of his nose because maybe you assholes still aren't getting the picture, AND HE IS NOT DOING THIS AGAIN.]

Once more, students: Do not have sex with Ivy. Do not have sex with her in the forest. Do not have sex with her outside the forest. Do not find a loophole in which to have sex with her. Do avoid the forest all together. Do attend class, and study, and get back to your homework.

[And though he would DESPERATELY LOVE to leave it at that, he has to tack this on:] Are there any questions?

[He somehow sounds incredibly bored while managing to get across that anyone who actually asks may find themselves shoved off the roof in their next flight lesson.]
ichoosefight: (so detective what brings you here?)

[personal profile] ichoosefight 2012-07-28 10:53 pm (UTC)(link)
I have a question.

Is it really poison ivy? Or is that just an excuse?
ichoosefight: (totally enthralled)

[personal profile] ichoosefight 2012-07-28 10:58 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't think I want to get close enough to test it. Better let the doctors handle that.
Edited 2012-07-28 23:03 (UTC)
buywithme: (magic)

[personal profile] buywithme 2012-07-28 10:59 pm (UTC)(link)
My mother has no phone. I presume this means I am exempt?
flawedgem: (Default)

Video

[personal profile] flawedgem 2012-07-28 11:05 pm (UTC)(link)
[Her lips only twitch once, and then she looks perfectly serious.]

I don't see why all students should avoid the forest altogether. She's perfectly pleasant if you behave yourself.

Honestly, I think this could be a good general lesson: respect nature, wherever you are.

...And wear protection. [Yes, all right, she's smirking. Really, people.]
wedonot: (lol that's hysterical.)

[Private]

[personal profile] wedonot 2012-07-28 11:08 pm (UTC)(link)
[Charles is unapologetically laughing his head off. For a while, because just omfg lmao how on earth did you get this job.]

That's the most moving public service announcement I think I've ever heard.
buywithme: (Merman 1)

with age inappropriate icons :>

[personal profile] buywithme 2012-07-29 12:00 am (UTC)(link)
I'm a senior.
Edited 2012-07-29 00:01 (UTC)
wedonot: (Teehee.)

[Private]

[personal profile] wedonot 2012-07-29 12:04 am (UTC)(link)
[No you don't. c:]

Who says I'll be the one given the task next time?
flawedgem: (Default)

Video

[personal profile] flawedgem 2012-07-29 12:08 am (UTC)(link)
I don't think I'm qualified, Mr. Lensherr.

You're a good teacher, though. [Yeah, she's trolling, but she still manages to sound quite sincere.]
ichoosefight: (it's so neat!)

[personal profile] ichoosefight 2012-07-29 12:11 am (UTC)(link)
You don't know, do you? Come on, aren't you at least curious if he got crabs from a plant woman?
flawedgem: (Default)

Video

[personal profile] flawedgem 2012-07-29 12:37 am (UTC)(link)
[:3 She's only complimenting you Erik :3]

...Well, my mind went to an odd place, I don't know about yours.

[Barbara stop you are fourteen years old.]
truth_is_cold: (rhade - smug jerk)

[Private]

[personal profile] truth_is_cold 2012-07-29 12:38 am (UTC)(link)
[Video.

With this smile.

That is all.]
wedonot: (Why don't you understand?)

[Private]

[personal profile] wedonot 2012-07-29 12:40 am (UTC)(link)
Yet it's a situation you've often lamented in the past.
buywithme: (Merman 2)

AND THEY LOVE YOU :>

[personal profile] buywithme 2012-07-29 12:42 am (UTC)(link)
Explain why!
ichoosefight: (picture this)

[personal profile] ichoosefight 2012-07-29 12:50 am (UTC)(link)
But what if it's going around? What if crabs is just running rampant through the woods?

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